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Recent Posts
- Learning to Like Myself – A Reflection
- The Labyrinth of Me
- Levels and Lymphocytes
- The Impossible Mountain
- The Able Body and the Mountain Within
- A Maven Clad In Raven’s Clothes
- The Cyclone That Life Can Be
- A Personal Victory!
- The Language of Smiles
- A Dance with the Waves
- A Journey of Ten Years
- The Lessons I’ve Learned
- Boats of Many Colours
- The Light of Small Joys
- The Deity of the Waves – Thoughts on Chemo and the River Within
- This Is My Journey
- Pushing Through
- Happy Birthday Max Shadow!
- Bodily Able – A Reflection
- The Power of Forgetting
- Captain Maven and the Shadow Man: AVAILABLE NOW!
- The Many Ways of Mavenclad
- The Light Through the Trees
- Someone I Used to Know
- The Challenges I Overcome
Category Archives: Depression
The Cyclone That Life Can Be
My adventure continues. I’ve been quiet on here lately. I was surprised to see that the last post on here was from September 2024. Surely it can’t have been that long? The world just seems too big sometimes, does anyone … Continue reading
Boats of Many Colours
I forgot again. There has been this pressure building in my mind and I couldn’t figure out why. My emotions have been like a constantly moving sea, unknowable and almost insurmountable. I’ve been carrying around depression like a hairshirt, feeling … Continue reading
Posted in Cerebral Palsy, Depression, Multiple Sclerosis, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts
Tagged boats, colours, dark forest, depressions, despair, joy, love, Sadness, suicide
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The Light of Small Joys
The thing is most of the time I feel okay. I can pretend that there is nothing wrong, that I’m totally fine and I don’t have anything to worry about…but then my mind reminds me of the fact that I’m … Continue reading
Posted in Cerebral Palsy, Depression, Fear, joy, Multiple Sclerosis, Symptoms
Tagged Cerebral Palsy, Chemo, falls, famil, friends, hot flashes, husband, joy, Mavenclad, Multiple Sclerosis, Small Joys, Symptoms
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The Light Through the Trees
Content Warning: Depression, Suicidal Thoughts and Self Harm It all gets to be too much sometimes. Like everyone else, I’ve been living in the cloud of covid. I haven’t been sleeping well, my temper is closer to the surface than … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts
Tagged Christmas, Depression, Every Day, everyday angels, Gifts, Mavenclad, Medication, My Truth, Self Harm, Suicidal Thoughts, Thankful, Therapy
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Relearning How to Live
This is a piece that I was asked to write for today, the International Day of Person’s with Disabilities. It was published in a newsletter at work and while it was nerve wracking to put myself out there like that, … Continue reading
Posted in Bladder problems, Brain Fog, Canes, Depression, discomfort, fatigue, Spasms, Speech, Tremors, Writing
Tagged Balance, Cerebral Palsy, Challenges, Grateful, Living, Multiple Sclerosis, Pain, Spasms, Symptoms, Tremors, Vertigo, walking
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The Maybe of Mavenclad
I’m afraid. As September comes ever closer, so does my medication change. During July, September seemed so far away but now as we get to the end of August, September 21st seems so much closer. On that day, I will … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Fear, invisible disabilities, Stress, Talking
Tagged Changing Meidcation, Maybe, Multiple Sclerosis, Symptoms
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Letting Go and Holding On
Life is funny when you stop to think about it. I’ve been carrying around a thrum of sadness for a few weeks now. While my general outlook on life has been positive, there was still this ache inside of me. … Continue reading
Posted in Covid-19, Depression, Disability, Happy Birthday, Little Yellow Magnet, Memoir
Tagged Fear, Happy Birthday, Max Shadow, Sadness
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Looking for the Oracle
Before I was diagnosed with relapse and remitting Multiple Sclerosis, I thought I could cure myself. Someone had said that it was all about mind over matter. I could choose not to be sick. I could choose my destiny and … Continue reading
Posted in Balance, Brain Fog, Depression, Disability Tropes, Nothing Without Us
Tagged Multiple Sclerosis, Story Behind the Story
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I’m Alive For This Moment
On Wednesday last week, I had an appointment with my neurologist. This is a joy for me. My doctor is a delight and makes going to the hospital a joy. She’s always upbeat and I feel as if I’m meeting … Continue reading
Posted in Depression, Doctors, Falling, Fatique, Insomnia, MRI's, Symptoms
Tagged I'm Alive For This Moment, Medication, Neurologists, New Symptoms, Thankfulness
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The Lion and the Internal Orchestra
I’d like to take a moment to talk about pain. Everyone experiences pain differently. Maybe it’s muscle pain or internal pain. Perhaps it’s a mixture of both. For myself, there is no rhyme and reason to it. My Multiple Sclerosis … Continue reading
Posted in Brain Fog, Depression, discomfort, Muscles, Spasms
Tagged Cerebral Palsy, Multiple Sclerosis, Orchestra, Pain, Strength, Symptoms, Tattoos
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Two Steps at a Time 